"How COVID-19 Can Help Your Eating Disorder Recovery" by Hilary Thomson

We are definitely living in a strange time right now. Anxieties are high and people around the world are struggling with adapting to the new reality brought on by the COVID-19 Pandemic.

This time is hard for anyone struggling with mental illness including people with eating disorders. I have struggled with anorexia since I was a teenager and have been in recovery for the past 3 years. I’m not going to lie this time has been extremely challenging. My routine, which I rely on so much to feel safe, has been disrupted and there is no telling when my anxiety will roar its ugly head, making my urges to engage in eating disorder behaviours even higher.

That being said, I have come far enough in my recovery now that I am able to flip this stressful and potentially triggering situation on its head. Here are a few of the ways that you can take advantage of this time of isolation and physical distancing to bolster instead of hinder your recovery.

Meal plan

Meal planning has been an essential part of my recovery process. I usually plan out my meals a week in advance so I can make sure to challenge myself and so that I don’t have any excuse to fall back into old behaviours when times get tough. In situations like this it is even more important to plan out your meals, especially because we are supposed to be limiting trips to the grocery store. Try and keep up with incorporating variety and fear foods into your diet. Plan to get takeout a few times a week and make sure you have “scary” foods sprinkled throughout the meal plan. I have been challenging myself to baked goods a few times a week so I picked up some muffins and tea biscuits from my local coffee shop that I could put in my freezer to have at home. Having a plan will help you take the anxiety of what you are going to eat out of your day to day. That’s not to say it won’t still be challenging to eat the foods you have on your plan, but there is something very helpful about the accountability of a meal plan. Once it’s written down your meals are decided and you can try on focus on other ways of taking care of yourself during this difficult time.

Practice Mindfulness

If the idea of sitting in a room with your thoughts is stressful, you are not alone. I have struggled with mindfulness for a long time. I can’t ever seem to get my mind to slow down and focus on the present. It is always worrying about the past or future and I find it difficult to be in the moment. However, with this period of isolation I have been forced to slow down. I have been making an effort to be more deliberate with everything I do. When I am brushing my teeth, I am brushing my teeth. When I am doing the dishes, I am doing the dishes. Doing one task at a time and trying to be mindful about it has done wonders for my anxiety. All we can really control is the present moment and if you focus your attention on what you are doing right NOW there is very little room for anxiety or ED thoughts to creep in. I know it is easier said than done but this period has been the first time I have really noticed the benefits of mindfulness and it is a game changer.

Let go of expectations

There is a lot of pressure out there to be productive during this time. I am a bit of an overachiever myself and it is my nature to want to plan out my day to be as productive as possible. It has been very helpful for me to let go of my productivity expectations and allow whatever I get done in the day to be enough. Maybe I cook, do laundry, write 3 articles and clean the bathroom all in one day. Or maybe I just watch endless recovery videos on You Tube. I have realized that being able to let go of the need to be productive all the time and relax is an important lesson for recovery. It is an act of self compassion to give yourself a break, especially in times of stress which is exactly what we are living right now.

Also, reframing my definition of productivity has been very helpful. In fact, not being as rigid and scheduled with my day IS productive for me because it is letting go of the perfectionism that has fueled my eating disorder for many years. Give yourself a break. Watch that TV show, read a good book, listen to a podcast. Give yourself permission to just be. It is a lesson that you will take into your daily life when this is all over and it will definitely be worth your while.

Curate your social media feed

Many of us are on social media a lot and may be relying on it to keep in touch with the world while we are practicing social distancing. You Tube, Facebook, Instagram and Twitter can be great ways to stay engaged with life, but can also be hugely triggering for someone in recovery from an eating disorder. There is so much content out there about gaining the “quarantine 15” and at home workouts. It can be hard not to buy into diet culture when we are surrounded with it 24/7.

However, there are lots of people online who are spreading messages of eating disorder recovery, body positivity and are rejecting the diet mentality. Go through your feed and make sure you are following only accounts that build you up and give you inspiration to continue on your recovery journey. Some people I recommend are Mia Findlay of What Mia Did Next (You Tube, Instagram and Twitter), Megsy Recovery (Instagram and You Tube), Tabitha Farrar ( Instagram and You Tube) and Jameela Jamil of I Weigh (Instagram).

Try and have fun with food

Eating disorders in general steal the joy out of eating. We tend to see what we put in our mouths as an equation. Calories in, calories out. We judge it based on macro-nutrients, micronutrients, food groups etc. It becomes so complicated that there is no way it can bring any joy or comfort.

 The fact is there is a lot of joy that can be found in food when we strip away the eating disorder mindset. Challenge yourself to try out a new recipe. Bake cookies and deliver them to a friend or family member in isolation (but make sure to keep some for yourself too). Eating regularly is a necessity in eating disorder recovery and it doesn’t always have to be a chore. You might actually find some motivation in switching up your diet and trying new things. I challenged myself to make cinnamon rolls from scratch last week so that my husband and I could enjoy fresh cinnamon rolls together for snack. I also packaged up a couple for my neighbour to share with her boyfriend. Was it more challenging than the protein bar I was planning on having for snack? Yes. Do I regret it? Not at all. It was worth the eating disorder discomfort to engage in an activity I enjoy and share it with family and friends. And guess what? They were delicious.

Practice flexibility

This is a huge one for people in eating disorder recovery. We are very rigid when it comes to food and exercise. It can be extremely scary to know that your safe foods may not be available and that you 

won’t be able to get to your usual workout class.

No matter how difficult it may be this is the time to practice flexibility in your food and exercise regime. It has been extremely helpful for me to consider the bigger picture when I am at the grocery store and unable to buy my usual brand of bread or having to get 2% instead of 1% yogurt. We are in the middle of a global pandemic and does it really matter if I have to buy bread that has a few extra calories or yogurt that has a bit more fat? Not really. In fact, it is a great way for me to break down my eating disorder rules and push forward with recovery.

When it comes to those exercise classes you may be missing consider this a great time to press pause and re-consider your motivation for engaging in exercise. If it causes you a lot of anxiety to stop it might be a good idea to takes some time off exercise to re-assess things. Try doing some light movement like taking a walk around your neighbourhood or doing a yoga class online. If you really don’t want to do any activity at all DON’T. You have permission to give yourself a break and rest.

These are just a few things that have been helpful for me to keep in mind while trying to move forward with my recovery during the COVID-19 pandemic. It has also been essential for me to keep in touch with my support team like my psychologist and dietitian. We are lucky to live in the age of the internet which makes virtual appointments not only possible but easy.

Don’t let the COVID-19 pandemic deter your recovery process. This can be a great time of healing and self discovery. No matter how hard it is right now it is possible to come out of this stronger than ever. I know I will, and you can too.